On Gratitude

These days, I find it really easy to get aggravated - slow drivers, red lights, etc. In particular, the Subway that I usually go to has a new crop of employees who are very inefficient in their sandwich artistry, to use polite terms... but then I think about how amused I used to be by people throwing a fit at Mickey D's, and I wonder if I've lost sight of how benign first world problems really are...

So I am thankful that:
- I have a job, even if it's not the most glamorous in the world
- I survived Iraq without PTSD or any other major injuries that I'm aware of
- Dad is still alive
- I still talk to two of my oldest friends in this life

60

Tonight, on my dad's 60th birthday, we went to visit him at the hospital. It's discomforting to me, knowing that I used to watch him play basketball at church 20 years ago and being full of vigor and energy, compared to how frail he is now. He's not lacking in determination, still walking around with his IV tether, but he's physically not the man he used to be and it's very tough for me to watch, and tougher to verbalize. When I came home on leave last year, it was surprising to me just how much age had changed him, and I didn't know how to deal with it... I still don't, for that matter.

On Relationships

God is clearly conspiring against me or something, because this shit is getting ridiculous - it's really funny, but it's really complicated!

On Loyalty

What does it mean, to be loyal? It's something that I try to pride myself on, my personal sense of loyalty to people, but what does it all really mean in the end? Is it something I maintain even if it's not the same for other people, and I may be let down? I think I figured this all out in Iraq, that I've accepted how I am about it and how I view it, but situations constantly arise that keep me on my toes... not a bad thing I guess.

Assyrian New Year - April 1st, 2011

KLANG KLANG KLANG KLANG
"Incoming Incoming Incoming!"

This was the most memorable rocket attack from the whole deployment - after we celebrated the Assyrian New Year at the PRT, I went back to my CHU (containerized housing unit) to relax and talk to people back home online. The first alarm went off, which I didn't mind...

BOOM!

The rocket must have landed really close because the explosion rattled my CHU pretty heavily. I stepped outside and turned right to look at my neighbor, and we both had the same expression on our faces.

"Uhhh we should probably run shouldn't we?" I asked.
"Yeah..."

We sprinted for the bunker behind our CHU neighborhood. More people joined us eventually who may not have been paying attention to the initial strike, and more rockets fell on the base as we all stood around inside our concrete refuge.

Not going to lie... it kind of sucked, haha.